Chapter 26

Waking up to realize the fact that I am already 26 is not as shocking as woke up to see yourself being turned into a beetle.
But still, I was kind of panic, even it's been 15 days since my birthday.
On one hand I feel grateful that I've lived in this planet for 26 years;
on the other hand I am thinking oh god I am 26 already, how?!

In the middle of twenty something.

It happened very often when relatives and my parent' friends saw me,
they asked my mom, how old is she now? does your daughter have a boyfriend yet?
If not, we can introduce some guys, her age is perfect for marriage now.

It seems to them that 26 is the age that you should start thinking about marriage.

Hey! it's 21st century!

I am just about to start my career, I am eager to learn new skills.
I have so many things that I wanna do.
I have adventures to be done.
I love my freedom, I love the fact that I can do whatever I want.

And there is this someone, I feel connected yet not really connected.

In a small room in my heart, there he is.

Not until there is nothing left in between,
not until I forget until I get over until I move on,
not until it's over,

will I consider to meet another.

So thank you very much I am fine.

Sometimes I forgot the fact that I am already 26.
This number doesn't really affect my life does it?
It's just because I am a woman and as a woman I got panic after saying goodbye to 25.
It makes sense,
because every now and then, in retrospect, it starts with 10 years ago.

10 years ago I was blah blah blah, blah blah blah
I am looking at myself in the past from the present time.

And then I think about my mom, she had me when she was 25.
I cannot see myself, 26, have a baby already.
What kind of life would I have instead of the life I have now?

When I was a little girl, my dream was naive.
I just wanted to grow up, get married, start a family and live happily ever after,
with lovely kids and a man I love and he loves me,
just like in the fairy tale.

I was a dreamer, I still am, just now I dream different things.

I wasn't the little girl anymore.

It was still a beautiful dream.

But I want different things in my life now.

26, I am more than ready to take whatever come my way.